I wonder why I am not allowed to be single. When men do it, they are swinging bachelors (insert 60’s go-go music). When white women do it, they are living the urban lifestyle (insert Sex and the City theme song). When I, a black woman, do it I am suffering from a national epidemic - Single Black Woman Syndrome. SBSW! Being in my early 30’s, SBWS is supposed to be the most pressing concern in my consciousness. Curiously, when I wake in the morning, my first thoughts are never “Where are you Prince Charming?”. I lean more towards, “How am I going to use today to build the life that I want for myself?”. Don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of companionship. Cuddling is fun. I just don’t feel this desperation for it that all the magazines and news programs are telling me I should feel. I doubt I am the only one. So why the hype? Is it an attempt to create another “otherness”to put on black women? Is it another attempt to make us feel inferior, unloved, and non desirable? I’ll leave you to draw your own conclusions. Either way, for all the other black women who refuse to suffer from SBWS - stand strong and proud of your choices! For those of you starting to feel a few of those suffocating symptoms - I say cast your net wide. Stop limiting your choices - give your number to that cute Asian guy hitting on you on the R train. Enjoy your life ladies (insert the Pharrell remix of 60’s go-go music)!